Episode 2 - Slab Number Five

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Episode 2 - Slab Number Five

Cast and Player Characters

==Non-Player Characters==ow a zombie



Long Story

Having just defeated a horde of skeletons, the group takes a moment to recuperate. Realizing that they don't know each other, they introduce themselves. At this point, however, they find that they have little memory of their lives before waking up on the slabs. They also notice that they each have a small wound behind their ear. They decide to try and escape. Tum Darkblade looks outside and discovers that the group is in what appears to be a holdfast deep in the middle of the woods. He also sees a path that leads away from the fort, but it is being guarded by a large and menacing figure.

Meanwhile, Thom the Dragonborn discovers a small bedroom, and the group takes several things from it. As they are exiting the bedroom, the door bursts open and who should stumble through but the handless man from the other slab. Unfortunately, he seems to have been turned into a zombie, and upon seeing the group, he attacks.

Much like the last battle, the fight is over quickly. Aludra the Dwarf transforms into a bear to better help her new friends, and the zombie brings Tum to within an inch of death. The group prevails, however, and the zombie collapses. But before they can celebrate, Junpei Iori realizes a sickening truth: these monsters are not so easy to kill. The zombie comes back to life; once again he lunges at the group, and once again he is slain.

After the battle, Thom finds a strange metal disc in the zombie's skull, which Junpei carefully picks up and takes with him. The group, now determined to get some answers, decides to explore the holdfast. They find their path blocked by three massive zombie hulks at the bottom of the stairs. Realizing that their chances of victory are slim, they stick to the original plan: escape. They sneak outside, climb onto an outhouse, and backflip over the fence--even Aludra, who is still a bear. They land safely on the other side, but while they are finally free, they don't feel any safer.


The group discovers that each of them has a small wound behind their ears, and that they are in a holdfast inside a forest. They are then attacked by the zombie of the man who lost his hand in the last episode. They take him out, he wakes up, and they take him out again. They then escape the strange castle, but are still lost in the forest somewhere.


  • First time the cast says their Twitter handles on-air

Quest Log Updates

  • [Active] - Find out who the players are
    • [New][Active] - Find a way back into the holdfast
  • [Complete] - Escape the mysterious castle


The group is in a large room.

Aludra: Uses Healing Surge

Tum: Uses Healing Surge (4 remaining, now at 19 Health)

Tum: Looks around the room

--A door leading outside, two other doors
--Four longswords and two longbows on the floor

Thom: Picks up and wields longsword

Junpei: Picks up sword

The group introduces themselves to each other

--Apart from their names and what they do, they cannot remember anything from before they woke up on the slabs

The group notices that they each have a small wound behind their right ear.

Aludra: Perception check (Rolls 11 + 10 Perception = 21)

--Hears a loud moaning from the stairs the group just came up

Tum Attempts to pick lock on door to outside (Rolls 15 + 12 Thievery = 27)

--Door isn't locked

The group looks outside.

--Dark and stormy night
--Very creepy
--A path leading to a gate, which has a large figure standing by it
--Lots of forest
--Seems to be a remote holdfast

Thom: Opens first door

--Sees a small bedroom (cot and dresser)

Thom: Checks dresser

--Sees clothing, satchel, cloak

Junpei: Arcana check (Rolls 14 + 9 Arcana = 23)

--Nothing in the bedroom seems magical

Tum: Tears off a piece of the cloak, wears it as a headband

Junpei: Takes satchel

Thom: Takes sheet off of the cot, wears it like a toga

-- +0 to AC

As the group is leaving the bedroom, the door to the staircase opens.

--The man with the missing hand enters the large room, but he now has a hand sewn onto his arm
--Looks upset
--Smells rank
--Seems less alive / more dead than before
--Seems to want to eat their brains

COMBAT (see "Combat, Part I", below)

Junpei: Religion check

--Remembers that these types of zombies come back to life

Zombie comes back to life

COMBAT (see "Combat, Part II", below)

Thom: Notices something glinting inside zombie's skull

Junpei: Examines object

--Appears to be a strange object

Junpei: Arcana check on object (Rolls 7 + 9 Arcana = 16)

--Small, complex metal disc
--More mechanical than magical in nature

Aludra: Heal check on ear wounds (Rolls 8 + 10 Heal = 18)

--Some operation has been performed on the group

Junpei: Uses satchel to pick up disc

The group hears thunking and moaning from the bottom of the stairs.

Tum: Uses Healing Surge (2 remaining, now at 16 Health)

Thom: Uses Healing Surge (Now at 17 Health)

Aludra: Perception check on second door (Rolls 12 + 10 Perception = 22)

--Sees a small kitchen with a back door
--Sack of potatoes on the floor

Tum: Takes knife from kitchen

--Now has four knives total

Tum: Stealthily opens back door (Thievery check)

--Sees the same large figure way off in the distance
--Small path leading to an outhouse
--Fence surrounds complex, but easily jumpable
--Lots of forest

Aludra: Listens at the door to the stairs (Rolls 3 + 10 Perception = 13)

--Hears thumping from bottom of the stairs

Junpei: Quietly opens door to the stairs

--Sees three zombies at the bottom of the stairs

The group decides to leave through the kitchen.

Junpei: Religion check on the zombies (Rolls a 20)

--Recognizes them as zombie hulks

The group sneaks outside with Tum leading the way

Tum: Jumps the fence

The group backflips over the fence.

--Aludra is still a bear

The group finds themselves in a dark forest.

--See a path off in the distance

Combat, Part I

--Initiative order: Aludra, Tum, Zombie, Thom, Junpei

Aludra (Turn 1)

--Standard: Chill Wind on zombie
Rolls 19 + 5 Wisdom = 24 vs. Fortitude, hits
1d6 (3) = 3 damage
Slides zombie 1 square

Tum (Turn 1)

--Standard: Dazing Strike on zombie
17 vs. AC, hits
Sneak Attack, Backstabber
7 + 2d8 (3, 7) = 17 damage
Zombie is Dazed until end of Tum's next turn (grants Combat Advantage, may only take one action)

Zombie (Turn 1)

--Does nothing (Dazed)

Thom (Turn 1)

--Standard: Furious Smash on zombie
Rolls 11 + 5 Strength + 2 Combat Advantage = 18 vs. Fortitude, hits
Free Action: Demonic Frenzy
Strength modifier (5) + 1d6 (2) = 7 damage.
Ally gains a power bonus to attack and damage rolls equal to Thom's Charisma bonus on their next attack against the target.

Junpei (Turn 1)

--Standard: Nightmare Eruption on zombie
Rolls 3 + 4 Intelligence = 7 vs. Will, misses

Aludra (Turn 2)

--Minor: Wild Shape on self
Turns into a bear
--Standard: Cull the Herd on zombie
Rolls 14 + 5 Wisdom = 19 vs. Will, hits
2d8 (4 total) + Wisdom modifier (5) = 9 damage
Moves zombie

Tum (Turn 2)

--Minor: Kisses dagger
--Minor: Says prayer to Sehanine
--Standard: Sly Flourish on zombie
16 vs. AC, hits
12 damage
Zombie is bloodied
Cuts off zombie's recently sewn-on hand, upsets zombie

Zombie (Turn 2)

--Slams Tum
25 vs. AC, hits
15 damage (leaves Tum at 4 Health, bloodies Tum)

Thom (Turn 2)

--Minor: Inspiring Word on Tum
"Hey man, you should probably fix your shit."
Tum regains 5 hit points (healing surge value) and rolls 1d6 (2) = 7 hit points (leaves Tum at 11 Health, still bloodied)
--Standard: Intimidate check against zombie
Rolls 14 + 10 Intimidate = 24, succeeds
Zombie is Shaken (-2 to all rolls except damage for the rest of the encounter)

Junpei (Turn 2)

--Standard: Ray of Enfeeblement on zombie
1d10 (6) + Intelligence modifier (4) = 10 damage
Zombie is Weakened until end of Junpei's next turn (attacks deal half damage)
--Minor: Waves Mage Hand in zombie's face to trigger bad memories
Zombie's eyes widen and he pees himself

Aludra (Turn 2)

--Standard: Swarming Locusts on zombie
Rolls 16 + 5 Wisdom = 21 vs. Reflex, hits
1d8 (3) + Wisdom modifier (5) = 8 damage
Kills zombie (0 enemies remaining)
Creates a 3x3 zone of swarming locusts (while in the zone, enemies grant Combat Advantage)

Combat, Part II

Zombie comes back to life (bloodied, 1 enemy remaining)

Tum (Turn 3)

--Standard: Piercing Strike on zombie
26 vs. Reflex, hits
Feat: Backstabber
17 damage

Zombie (Turn 3)

--Attacks Thom
14 damage (leaves Thom at 12 Health, bloodies Thom)

Thom (Turn 3)

--Minor: Dragon Breath on zombie
Rolls 20 + 5 Strength + 2 = 27 vs. Reflex, hits (critical)
1d6 (6) = 6 damage
--Standard: Furious Smash on zombie
Rolls 3 + 5 Strength = 8 vs. Fortitude, misses

Junpei (Turn 3)

--Standard: Spirit Rend on zombie
Rolls 14 + 4 Intelligence = 18 vs. Will, hits
No damage (target is undead)
Zombie takes a free action to move as far as its Speed allows to a square farther away from Junpei, zombie is Dazed (save ends)
Opportunity attack: Tum (23 vs. AC, hits, 4 damage) kills zombie (0 enemies remaining)
Tum is covered in zombie entrails
Opportunity attack: Thom (17 vs. AC, hits, 12 damage) to zombie entrails

Each hero earns 100 XP (350 total)

Memorable Quotes

  • "If there's any girls there I wanna do them!" (Mike Bachmann)
  • "Last week on 'Drunkards and Dragons'...Oh no where are we? We're in this room! What's that guy? I'm gonna hit him with my hand. LIGHTNING BREATH! Let's go out here. Oh my God, there's blood. Let's go away from the blood. What's THAAAAAT???? It's a skeleton. Imma hit him! You should probably hit him. Imma hit him! You should probably hit him again. I missed! I have an arrow. We win! Let's pick up some loot." (Tim Lanning, on the previous episode)
  • "Is this like Duke Nukem rules where I can just carry a million weapons?...Can I kick with both feet at the same time?" (Mike Bachmann)
  • Tum: "Guys, whose ear hurts? My ear hurts."
Aludra: "My ear hurts too!"
Junpei: "Hey guys, my ear is real ouchie."
Thom: "My left ear feels great! I'm an optimist."
  • "Fuck me, bear mommy!" (Tum)
  • "All I'm saying is that a Herman Munster family reunion is not something that we are prepared for right now!" (Steven Strom)