Episode 347 - The Gremp

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"Have you not a Wormtongue to whisper into your ear?" ~ Rowan Grey

"It feels so good to be blasting ass with my friends again!" ~ Skud Derringer

"You could have fried an egg on me, and I would have been the omelet." ~ Lahni Caplain

Contents

Episode 347 - The Gremp

Being an adventurer means having to spin a lot of plates. And sometimes those plates, well, you just have to let other plate spinners deal with. But also sometimes you realize that the disease you ignored is still a spinning and you gotta kick a cloud giant’s butt.

Cast and Player Characters

Non-Player Characters

Locations

Story

Long Story

Having defeated Rick the Beholder last episode, Toby and Skud part ways temporarily. Toby heads off to the library, no surprise there, to do some research on their next target, Pyre, while Skud returns to The Tower of Grey to meet up with Lahni and Rowan. Rake informs them that Old Man Weck wants to speak with them, and has provided with them a teleportation stone that will instantly transport them to Deephome. So, that they do. Old Man Weck has aged significantly since we last saw him, now referring to himself as Older Man Weck. OMW escorts them to the throne room of Wyrmsbane Keep, where they discover, not Queen Aludra Wyrmsbane, but Bucky!

Apparently, Aludra and her wife, General Jaela, have run off, in search of the elusive Adira Harper, leaving poor young Bucky in charge. They've been gone for three weeks, and even Ros, sent out to find them, has not returned. Luckily, however, Bucky has had some help in the form of one Braenth of Barovia, a mysterious figure dressed in raggedy cloaks, with pale skin and jet black hair. He knows who they are, and offers to help them find their next target for the Bones cards: a Cloud Giant doing some mischief in the form of The Gremp, an evil disease that's actually come up on the show before. It was affecting Calsten, and broke all the rules of DnD. It was highly suspected that The Gremp was specifically created to annoy Nika, as her character at the time, Jaela, a paladin, couldn't heal it, and her current character, Lahni, a monk, couldn't resist it. In any event the Gremp is back, and spreading. The disease turns people into swamp creatures, as evident by Calsten, currently overrun with the beasts. And, it seems to be due to this Cloud Giant. So, they should probably go stop it. Fortunately, their new friend Braenth knows a lot about this thing. It lives in a cloud castle in, as one might expect, the clouds. But how does one get there? Why, an airship, of course!

The party, together, returns to the Tower of Grey, using another teleportation stone. These probably would have come in handy before now, huh? Anyway, they board their airship, the Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap, and take off. I think Michael wanted the episode to end here, but they got to this point so quickly that on the episode goes! Led by Braenth, the ship flies past the a village where everyone has succumbed to the Gremp. Sad stuff. Soon, the cloud kingdom is visible, above what appears to be torrential rain. This sparks Nika/Lahni to question if they themselves are in danger of catching this disease, since, you know, monks can't resist it, and all. Seems that, Braenth informs, the Gremp is transferred, somehow, through the rain. So, Lahni makes some ponchos for everyone.

Now solidly above the clouds, our intrepid adventurers notice three shapes flying toward them from the castle. They appear to be Wyverns, sent out to stop them! Rowan and Skud do ranged attacks, but Lahni is a melee fighter? What's a monk to do? Um, run on water, of course! But, what's that? There's no water, because they're up in the air, floating above Drunkeros? Well, my fool of a friend, have you not heard of condensation? What is a cloud, after all, if not water? And so it is, that the poor, dear Lahni decides to leap off the flying airship, run at... just ridiculous speeds toward these creatures and attack them. She runs to the first one, punches it. She runs to the second one, punches it. She runs to the third, punches it, turns to run back, and is hit by that third one! She trips, and begins hurtling toward the ground below.

Fortunately, the group has with them a Braenth, who tells the others to focus on those Wyverns, and pulls an Anakin Skywalker. That is to say, jumps off the side of the ship after Lahni. After he catches her, he casts Fly to stop them both mid-air. Lahni hears "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?" playing as Braenth flings her back to the clouds where she begins running again, back to the Wyverns to kill the one that got her. Then runs back to the ship. Braenth then reveals what he's been carrying around with him: a giant, Final Fantasy 7-esque razor sword, which he uses to slice through the final Wyvern after Skud weakens it near unto death (more on that in the Trivia section). He then lands back on the ship with a cool one-liner.

Short

Skud teams back up with Rowan and Lahni. They head to Deephome to be told of the disappearance of Aludra and Jaela. Also, they meet Braenth, a mysterious figure who tells them about the Gremp, a disease from a while back that turns people into swamp creatures. It's spreading because of a cloud giant in the sky, living in a cloud castle. Together, they jump on their airship, The Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap, and head for the cloud castle. They fight some Sky Wyverns (Skyverns?) and Lahni almost falls to her death. She's saved at the last minute by Braenth.

Trivia

  • Bachmann gets Old Man Weck and Zird mixed up
  • Jennifer says that Rake looks like something called "Bustifer Jones" from Cats
  • Michael has introduced Portkeys into this world
  • Bucky doesn't know how to do laundry
  • Older Man Weck refers to Aludra as Queen Wyrmsbane, and Jaela as General Jaela
  • The grimp was originally introduced as a problem in Calsten way back in Episode 161 - Welcome to Calsten
  • Michael officially allows Lahni to run across clouds, because monks can run on water, and what is a cloud if not water?
    • Okay, this is absurd. Lahni can canonically run on clouds!
  • Bachmann becomes a character in the show for a second, and for some reason his voice is, not his regular voice, but that of Iago from Aladdin!
  • Skud does, in fact, kill the Wyvern, but Michael gave it to Braenth, as the guest

Quest Log Updates

  • [On-Hold] - Stop Tiamat!
  • [Active] - Destroy The Orb!
    • [Active] - Find the first missing piece
      • [Active] - Gain access to the Elite Forge
        • [Active] - Defeat Fuckin Gary, Master of the Air Plane
        • [Active] - Defeat The Man of Sorrow, Master of the Earth Plane
        • [Active] - Defeat Lucis Incendis, Master of the Fire Plane
        • [Active] - Defeat The Maronnesse, Master of the Water Plane
          • [Active] - Capture three powerful creatures for Skud's Bone Game
            • [On-Hold] - Defeat and capture Pyre the Dragon
            • [Active] - Defeat and capture the Cloud Giant
    • [On-Hold] - Find the third missing piece
      • [On-Hold] - Investigate the final location
  • [On-Hold] - Find Adira Harper
  • [Backburner] - Find Lannie Caplain
  • [Active] - Find a way to pay back the Ferrim Pecunia bank of Pelor's Hope
  • [Active][Jaeludra] - Investigate the Great Colosseum in Caer

Rolls

  • Recap
    • Bachmann - 3