Random Encounters: Norhall Academy for Adventurers and Heroes - Episode 9

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"You're ruining my dark, brooding, gothic horror adventure!" ~ An Angry Tim

"All right, everyone. Get to your fucking posts!" ~ Jessga

"Smaaaaaaaaaash Laaaarsssonnn!!!" ~ Smash Larson


Norhall Academy for Adventurers and Heroes: Episode 9

With the unseen and mysterious army approaching the town, our newly minted adventurers have to decide the best plan of defense. The folks from Horsk are not the most highly trained fighting force in Drunkeros but they are hearty people. You have to be in order to live this far North. Will it be enough to save the day? Only one way to find out

Cast and Player Characters

Non-Player Characters



Long Story

In the town of Horsk, Mayor Agnog Greenbar Corduroy Denims is trying to clear out the city, to prepare for the upcoming Vampire Army invasion. He brings in Jessga, a tough warrior, who seems not to respect the Norhallians. Val tries to show her Scroll of Pedigree, but she is having none of it. After some attempts to win Jessga over, Val is able to convince her of the threat approaching. Another dude shows up, named Leon, who's super Aragorn-y, which is slightly different than Arag-horny, which is when you're horny for Aragorn. Leon doesn't do anything, and then yet another character arrives, and at this point I'm convinced that Norhall is just a ploy by Tim to make my job as difficult as possible. This new character is a youth named Sig (?) and he wants to fight against the Vampires to avenge his parents, who were recently killed. Jessga is against this at first, but acquiesces to his passion. She then turns to The Daring Dragoons and asks what they need. Isaac asks about the demographics of the town, what resources they have to work with. Jessga explains that there are about 700 people living in Horsk, about 100 fighters (only about 50 of which are worth anything), some archers, some trained combat folks. She suddenly gets hostile toward them, and Isaac persuades her to calm down. She draws in the ground, a map of the town, including the exit roads. There is one that goes North, to Norhall Academy, and one that goes Southeast, to the rest of the civilized world. She says that they could send the villagers to the church, or, there is a large house to the east that is owned by the Kidd family, particularly ol' Jasper. He set up a successful fur trading business, allowing for him to buy the largest house in all of Horsk. She's unsure if he would help, however.

Isaac has to idea to concentrate all of the townsolf into one building, so they can defend it, rather than a bunch of spread out buildings. Jessga agrees, and commands Teddy Yudain to go start making the arrangements. He does, and begins herding people into as few buildings as possible within Town Square. Many people are in the Town Hall, many people are trying to get into the tavern (the best place to be). Smash suggests they try to form a barricade, and Sig pops in to tell them that he brought his late parents' cart, which could be used, along with other carts, to form a blockade. The army is about 20 minutes away at this point, so Bek suggests digging a pit filled with non-sterile spikes to trap some of them. A bunch of the folks in town get to work on that. Val is kind of freaking out, not used to being around so many frantic people. Bek tries to pep her up, using some tough love. Smash helps. She does snap out of it a little bit.

20 minutes pass. Things are calm now, and they don't hear anything. Isaac tries to go through a tall building to look from the top and see if he can see the army approaching, but is shooed away by the man of the house. Smash is also there, and he intimidates the man into joining the militia outside. Isaac makes it to the roof and looks outside, and can see some of the treetops moving. It does seem that the army is waiting in the forest. Isaac returns to the ground and tells Jessga that the army is right on top of them, and everyone takes offensive stances. Jessga asks them if they have any advice for their army, since they've never faced anything like this before. Isaac merely tells them to "Aim for the Head." Isaac and Smash have a kind of tug of war to be further in front of the others, until Isaac picks up the half-orc. Bek stands on the corner of a building. Zin also is far ahead, trying to watch Smash and Isaac, because it's funny. Val hangs out back near the mayor and other townsfolk, to protect them, and calm them down. She's about 200 ft away.

20 more minutes pass. People are starting to get restless. The party can hear the sounds of the army outside, feet stomping and crunching and all that, while the denizens of Horsk are getting angrier at the Norhallians. Bek wants to ride out there on a horse to see if they are out there, maybe lure them out. Isaac agrees to join her, and Jessga rides up, telling her that she will go, as well as Leon. Sig also rides up, he wants to go, too. Jessga suggests that all the Norhallians go, which they agree to. Smash goes to get Val. The group heads out into the woods, noticing that the sun is going down. This reminds them that they are fighting Vampires, and they were probably waiting for night-time to attack. Sig heads off into the forest by himself, syaing that he wants revenge on whatever killed his family. Leon and Jessga follow, and Bek tries to have a discussion about whether they should let these three go in and die, or should they go in after them. She is interrupted by Smash Leroy Jenkins-ing all over the podcast, and runs right in. The other follow, resigned.

As they move through the forest, they see no Vampires, or threats of any kind. Sig starts to get angry with the Norhallians. Smash examines the tracks in the ground, and determines that there were a few creatures that approached the edge of the forest and turned around, perhaps scouts of some kind? Time passes, and night set in. The group begins to hear voices, they can't tell if they are real or imagined. Probably imagined, though, as some of the voices are their loved ones, and strange sounds that couldn't exist. The episode ends...


The town of Norhall prepares for battle. Nothing happens. Eventually, the Horskians get annoyed with the Norhallians, prompting the adventurers, along with Jessga, Leon, and Sig, to head into the forest to search for the army. They find nothing, but once the sun goes down, they begin to hear strange and spooky voices that may or may not be coming from their own minds...


  • Confirmed that Agnog is, in fact, the mayor
    • Also, his name is now Corduroy Denims
      • This is because Tim forgot the character's name from the last episode, and didn't have a handy Wiki to help him. Sorry, Tim
  • Josh clarifies that Issac is a Cleric (Clericfies?). I don't think we knew his class before
  • The population of Horsk is roughly 700
  • Horsk is exactly the same as Barovia from the Curse of Strahd
  • Smash gets inspiration from his new best friend, Isaac
  • Their forces are 50 decent fighters and 51 peasants with shitty weapons

Quest Log Updates


  • Recap
    • Matt

  • They all roll Wisdom to explain things to Mayor Denims
    • Val - 15
    • Zin - Nat20
    • Isaac - 17
    • Smash - 14
    • Bek - 3
      • They do, together

  • Isaac rolls Cleanliness check to flex at Jessga and impress her - 11
    • I don't think it works

  • Val rolls Deception to tell Jessga that they are all in danger - 22
    • She believes her

  • Isaac rolls Persuasion to get Jessga to accept their help - 22
    • Val aids - 22
      • Success - She accepts their help

  • They roll History to see what they remember from their classes
    • Smash - 2
      • nope
    • Val - 12
      • She thinks that it might be bad to fight in these streets
    • Isaac - 15
      • He thinks they could draw them into the city, or they could investigate the enemy and figure out another way
    • Bek - 14
      • Doesn't know much more than the others
    • Zin - 1
      • wut

  • Isaac rolls Survival to see if it would be better to concentrate the villiagers into one building - 5
    • He thinks that's a good idea

  • Bek rolls Persuasion to snap Val out of her shock - 12
    • It kind of works

  • Smash rolls Persuasion to do the same - 10
    • It also kind of works

  • Isaac rolls Persuasion to calm down the family that he climbs through the house of - 7
    • They freak out, and threaten him

  • Smash also rolls Persuasion to convince the patriarch of the family to fight with the militia - 11
    • He admits to being a coward

  • Smash Intimidates him instead - 23
    • He agrees to leave his family and fight

  • Isaac rolls Perception to look for the army outside - 17
    • He sees the treetops swaying

  • Isaac rolls Acrobatics to pick up Smash and hold him above his head - Nat20
    • He does that

  • Bek runs up and down her building to test how to do it quicly, using Acrobatics - 15
    • She learns how to do it

  • Smash rolls 3 Athletics checks to stay on Isaac's shoulders - 17, 16, 14
    • He was actually already off his shoulders

  • Isaac rolls either Persuasion or Intimidation to get Sig, Leon, and Jessga to not go into the forest alone - 15
    • They don't listen

  • Bek rolls Animal Handling to ride her horse into the forest - 21
    • Success - She is able to do it

  • Val makes a Persuasion roll to get Smash to put her down - 18
    • Smash rolls Insight to see if he understands her - 9
      • He puts her down

  • Val makes a Persuasion roll to convince Sig to calm down - 27
    • Success - He sits down and apologizes

  • Smash rolls Survival to try to find Vampire army tracks - 15+4
    • He doesn't see the kind of tracks a large army would leave behind

  • Bek rolls Survival to see if she notices the tracks too - 18
    • She does